Life's Not Fair
by blueglows
Summary: In which two robots are enamored with the same ranger, meet similar fates, and come to the same conclusion. Slash. Crack pairings. Based on the episode "Wirewolf".


"Alright guys, it's night again. Time to go scout the area for something that isn't there. Whose turn is it this time?"

"Mine, sir!" one robot answered.

"Mine!" the other answered simultaneously.

The two robots, Sentries One and Two, turned their gazes towards each other, emitting waves of annoyance that only a robot's sensory unit could detect. They did their best to intimidate each other, fighting for dominance in their ploy to spend time with Ranger Ty Parsec.

Said ranger looked at a schedule on the wall. "Oh, actually, it's Sentry Four's turn. Where is he?"

Sentry Three piped up then. "Oh, Four's out doing errands for one of the scientists. He won't be back in time for your scouting."

"Again? Sheesh, it's like you and Four never go scouting. Alright, I guess we can skip him. Sentry One, you're with me." Ty turned and walked away.

Sentry One followed after the human, turning back once to taunt Sentry Two. Two was clearly angry and Three was running behind some equipment where Four was waiting. At least One only had to compete with Two for Ty's attention. Three and Four were too into each other to care about the organic.

...

Sometime later, Sentry One and Ty were still out searching for possible intruders.

"Nothing on sensors, Ranger Parsec." It always made him tingle in ways he couldn't describe when he got to say the ranger's name.

"Ugh, nothing ever is. What do you go say we go find nothing in Sector Four?"

Oh, that wit! Just another admirable trait about Ty. But, the organic was clearly bored with his job. If only there were something he could do to help liven it up for him. Wait... There was something on the sensors, though he couldn't tell exactly what... Maybe this would give Ty some excitement? But, he couldn't just tell the ranger else it might be taken care of too easily.

"Sector Four looks clear too, sir."

"Really? That's a surprise."

Sentry One rocked back and forth, trying to not let it show how uncomfortable he was having LIED to Ty. To THE Ranger Ty Parsec. He missed the rest of what the ranger said due to his own fear that he'd be deactivated for lying like that.

They continued walking, Sentry One following closely behind Ty, trying not to make the mistake of lying again. Thousands of possible scenarios flooded his CPU, each of them depicting a horrible fate as punishment for lying, some of which depicted Ty being the most upset with him and shunning him for the sake of Sentry Two.

He barely registered anything around him until he felt something tackle him, knock him to the ground, and bite into his power pack.

This was not in any of the scenarios he had in mind, but it was just as painful as the rest.

"Losing power..."

His mind was going. He could feel it. If only Ty could save him. Be his "knight in shining armor" as the phrase went. But no, at this point he was too far gone, regardless of what happened.

He heard a screech and then felt a familiar organic hand rolling him over.

"Sentry One? Are you alright?"

His eye LED flickering, Sentry One tried his best to show the Ranger how much he cared about him. "You... Got... Your action sir..." Ty loved to use wit. It was only fair that Sentry One did his best to imitate it before he shut down forever.

Ty rushed to his communicator. "Ah- Uh- Ranger Ty Parsec reporting to Star Command! We have a situation on planet Canis Lunis..." Was that a grin? A sincere grin from the ranger? It suited him. "Nothing I can't handle."

...Okay, that ranger was going to get all the other robots killed at that rate. He grabbed onto Ty's arm (secretly enjoying the effort of being so close). "It's an energy vampire! Send back up!" With that, he dropped to the ground, the action using up the last of his energy.

His only regret was that Sentry Two now had his chance to woo Ty. It was his final conclusion before he shut down for good, but: Life's not fair.

...

Sentry Two did his best not to show it, but he was glad that home-wrecker Sentry One was no longer around to try and steal Ty from him. Now HE got to be the one to spend the most time with Ty since Sentries Three and Four were to busy trying to figure out how to give each other hickeys (though, admittedly, they got the idea after seeing Sentry One's body... Those two were sick robots.)

He was waiting out near the landing pad with Ty no, just listening to that sweet, sweet voice talk to him, not even caring what he actually said. It was pleasurable enough just to be with him; he didn't need to comprehend what he was saying.

"Just so long as they didn't send..."

"Ty! Buddy!"

"Him!" Ty banged his head against his helmet. Sentry Two immediately felt upset that Lightyear could cause Ty so much distress. "Ugh, where's a wormhole when you need one?"

Lightyear stepped up to Ty, saying things that obviously made Ty upset, TOUCHING Ty. Who did this guy think he was? Buzz Lightyear? Oh... Oh wait. Maybe he should stop glaring, then.

As the walked back inside, Sentry Two watched after Ty, making sure Lightyear wouldn't do anything to make him more upset.

"So, I hear you have an energy vampire..." XR, famous amongst the robotic service members of Star Command, said as he rolled up beside him. "Hey, just between us robots, where are the good hiding places on this burg?"

"...Uh, air ducts 4 through 7, but you didn't hear it from me."

Then came the silent communication that robots could do via waves undetectable by organics.

"So, you like him, huh?"

"Ranger Parsec? Yeah. I've been meaning to get rid of Sentry One for years. Glad I didn't have to dirty my servos since that energy vampire did it for me."

"H-Hey, trust me, that energy vampire is no good. Sentry One probably had a horrible fate."

"Eh, I guess. I'll be inside from here on out and I doubt that vampire can get in there. As long as no other robot gets between me and Ranger Parsec, I'll be happy."

"...Hey, no need for intimidation. I have my optics on female organics!"

"Good. Remember, just in case, air ducts 4 through 7 are your best hiding places."

...

That night, Sentry Two did his duty of patrolling the inside for malicious activity. Not that he thought there wouldd BE any, but who knew what could happen. He went in the direction where he'd stop by Ty's room last. There, he'd check in on his favorite ranger, just to make sure he was okay and maybe give him some comfort. Apparently he was bitten by NOS-4-A2, and, since he was an organic, that was BOUND to hurt badly.

Wait... What was that beastly looking thing?

"You there! Halt! You're in a restricted area!"

The best shied away from his flashlight. Good so far. Wait, what was it-? They landed to the floor, crashing, with the flashlight rolling away from his grip. Sentry Two was pinned down, being ripped apart, and there was little he could do about it.

"Ugh! Attacking a cyber officer, eh? You're in real trouble pal!" He was panicking. He always rambled when he was panicking. This was not good. If only Ty could save him; be his "knight in shining armor" as the phrase went. But no, he was too far gone now, no matter what happened.

"Ow! Oh... Oh, I should have stayed in the air du..."

He couldn't finish his sentence. He didn't even get to say parting words to Ty, unlike that darn Sentry One.

It was his final conclusion before he shut down for good, but: Life's not fair.


End file.
